by Ima Schmuck / The Schalotte / February 3, 2012
I was on my way to interview Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano when I got stuck in a traffic jam just outside Washington. Nothing was moving.
Suddenly, a man knocks on the window. I rolled the window down and asked, "What's going on?"
He replied, "Terrorists have kidnapped most members of Congress, and they're asking for a 100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire. We are going from car to car, collecting donations."
I asked, "How much is everyone giving, on average?"
The man replied, "Roughly a gallon."
Put me down for a gallon and a half.
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