Monday, September 22, 2014

MONGOLIAN VENEREAL DISEASE

While touring China, a man from Houston, Texas is very sexually active with a number of prostitutes and does not use a condom the entire time he is there.

A week after arriving back home in Houston, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots. Horrified, he immediately rushes to Houston’s preeminent Medical Center to see a doctor.

The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.

The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says, "I've got bad news for you. You've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here in the US, and we know very little about it."

The man looks a little perplexed and says, "Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc."

The doctor answers, "I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis."

The man screams in horror, "Noooo! Absolutely not! I want a second opinion!"

The doctor replies, "Well, it's your choice. Go ahead if you want, but surgery is your only option."

The next day, the man rushes to Houston’s Asia Town and seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'll know more about the disease.

The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims, "Ah yes, Mongolian VD. Vewy ware disease."

The guy says to the doctor, "Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can we do? My American doctor wants to cut off my dick!"

The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs. "Stupid American docttah, always want opawate. Make more money dat way. No need amputate!"

"Oh, thank God!" the man exclaims.

"Yes," says the Chinese doctor. "Wait two week. Faw off by itself!"

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