Wednesday, June 12, 2013

PUBLIC LEWDNESS AT GUNS-R-US

By Pamela Putz

The Unconventional Gazette / June 12, 2013

PINEVILLE, W. Va. – Sheriff’s deputies arrested 81-year-old Homer Ferguson for public lewdness at the Guns-R-Us store in Pineville.

A Sheriff's spokesman told The Unconventional Gazette that Ferguson caused a loud disturbance at the checkout stand Monday when he attempted to pay for some gunpowder and ammunition he was purchasing. The gun shop's cashier told the arresting officers that all of a sudden Ferguson up and stripped off his clothing. She said the naked man caused quite a commotion among the store’s other customers.

According to the police report, here is Ferguson’s version:

“I was trying to pay for a can of gun powder and a couple boxes of bullets, but I was having a problem swiping my credit card. Suddenly the cashier told me to ‘Strip down, facing me!’ While making a mental note to complain to my Congressman about our ridiculous gun control laws, I complied with the cashier’s instructions. The cashier screamed, and she kept on screaming, and I noticed people running for the exit. Then the cops came and arrested me. It wasn't until then that I found out the cashier was only telling me how to swipe my credit card.”

During his arraignment Tuesday, Ferguson appeared in court along with the arresting officers and the Guns-R-Us manager and cashier. When Justice of the Peace Caleb McGuire heard Ferguson’s explanation he dismissed the public lewdness charge. Judge McGuire admonished the manager and cashier that they needed to be a lot clearer with their credit card swiping instructions to seniors.

The Guns-R-Us manager told The Unconventional Gazette that he asked Ferguson to shop elsewhere in the future.

Editor’s Note: Had old Homer stripped buck-naked in a store in San Francisco, the cashier would not have screamed and the other customers would have continued shopping, taking hardly any notice. If anything, they would have been pissed-off at an 81-year-old naked geezer for holding up the line at the checkout stand.

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