AS SHARP AS THE SPINES ON A CACTUS … BUT

Hillary Clinton and Huma Abedin went camping in the Mojave Desert. After they got their tent all set up, both women fell sound asleep.

Some hours later, Huma wakes Hillary and says, 'Honey, look up, what do you see? '

Hillary replies, 'I see millions of stars.'

‘What does that tell you?' asked Huma.

Hillary ponders for a minute then says, 'Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.’

‘What's it tell you, Huma?'

‘Hillie, you may be as sharp as the spines on a cactus, but it tells me someone stole the fucking tent.’