A SHOT IN THE GROIN

By Adolf der Schweinehund

The Unconventional Gazette / August 13, 2012

A friend of mine from Louisiana sent me this story about his neighbor Boudro ‘Bud’ Thibodeaux who just got out of the hospital after an unfortunate hunting accident.

Bud was hunting teal in a rice field outside Gueydan, Louisiana. He leaned the old 16 gauge double-barrel shotgun against the corner of the blind and stepped out to take a leak. As luck would have it, old Beau, his faithful dog knocks the gun over. It goes off and Bud took a good bit of #4 shot in the groin.

Several hours later, lying in a Lafayette Charity Hospital bed, he comes to.... and there is his doctor, Pierre Boudreaux...

"Well Bud, I got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you are gonna live. The damage was local to your groin, there was very little internal damage, and we were able to remove all of the birdshot."

"What's the bad news?", asks Bud...

"The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive birdshot damage done to your pecker. I'm going to have to refer you to my sister, Louisa ."

"Well, I guess that isn't too bad," says Bud. "Is your sister some kinda plastic surgeon?"

"Not exactly," Dr. Boudreaux says. "She's a flute player in the Baton Rouge Symphony Orchestra. She's gonna teach you where to put your fingers, so you don't piss in your face.