Two nuns were shopping at a 7-11 store. As they passed by the beer cooler, one nun said to the other, “Wouldn’t a nice cool beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening?”
The other nun answered, “Indeed it would Sister, but I would not feel comfortable buying beer because I am certain it would cause a scene at the checkout counter.”
“I can handle that without a problem,” the other nun replied. Then she picked up a six-pack of Bud Light and headed for the checkout counter.
The cashier had a surprised look on his face when the two nuns put a six-pack of beer on the counter.
“We use beer for washing our hair,” the nun said. “Back at our nunnery we call it Catholic shampoo.”
Without blinking an eye, the cashier left the counter and came back with a large package of pretzel sticks which he placed beside the beer. He then looked the nun straight in the eye, smiled and said, “The curlers are on the house.”
Sunday, March 29, 2015
Thursday, March 26, 2015
HYPNOTIST ENTERTAINS SENIOR CITIZENS CENTER
It was entertainment night at the Senior Citizens Center. After the community sing-along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show - Claude the Hypnotist.
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance. "Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time," said Claude.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew, from his waistcoat pocket, a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch," said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see. "It's a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations," said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch --- Watch the watch --- Watch the watch."
The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth. The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces.
A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch. They were hypnotized.
And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!! The beautiful watch fell to the stage and broke into pieces.
"Shit!" exclaimed Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens Center and Claude will never be invited there again.
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance. "Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time," said Claude.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew, from his waistcoat pocket, a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch," said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see. "It's a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations," said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch --- Watch the watch --- Watch the watch."
The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth. The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces.
A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch. They were hypnotized.
And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!! The beautiful watch fell to the stage and broke into pieces.
"Shit!" exclaimed Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens Center and Claude will never be invited there again.
Wednesday, March 25, 2015
GUILTY FINDING IN CALIFORNIA DOG MAULING CASE
A Stockton man, whose dog attacked and killed a woman, has been convicted of involuntary manslaughter
By Bob Walsh
PACOVILLA Corrections blog
March 25, 2015
I have written before about the case of Brian Hrenko, 60, a Stockton man who was being prosecuted for the dog mauling death of his next-door neighbor. A jury has just found Hrenko guilty of involuntary manslaughter and he faces as much as 56 months in prison.
The dead woman, Claudia Gallardo, 36, was a house cleaner. She had come to Gallardo’s home at the request of the property management company to arrange to clean the house, so she was not some casual trespasser. Gallardo was speaking with Hrenko’s lady friend in a friendly fashion when the dog attacked. Gallardo died at the scene.
The jury took less than three hours to come in with a verdict. Sentencing will be next month.
By Bob Walsh
PACOVILLA Corrections blog
March 25, 2015
I have written before about the case of Brian Hrenko, 60, a Stockton man who was being prosecuted for the dog mauling death of his next-door neighbor. A jury has just found Hrenko guilty of involuntary manslaughter and he faces as much as 56 months in prison.
The dead woman, Claudia Gallardo, 36, was a house cleaner. She had come to Gallardo’s home at the request of the property management company to arrange to clean the house, so she was not some casual trespasser. Gallardo was speaking with Hrenko’s lady friend in a friendly fashion when the dog attacked. Gallardo died at the scene.
The jury took less than three hours to come in with a verdict. Sentencing will be next month.
FIRING SQUAD BACK IN UTAH
In the event that Utah cannot obtain any lethal drugs, it now has a backup plan of execution by firing squad
By Bob Walsh
PACOVILLA Corrections blog | March 24, 2015
On Monday, Governor Gary Herbert of Utah signed the law which again permits the firing squad for executions in Utah when lethal injection drugs are not available.
The Governor said he still prefers lethal injection, but acknowledges that the state must have a backup plan when Plan A is unavailable.
By Bob Walsh
PACOVILLA Corrections blog | March 24, 2015
On Monday, Governor Gary Herbert of Utah signed the law which again permits the firing squad for executions in Utah when lethal injection drugs are not available.
The Governor said he still prefers lethal injection, but acknowledges that the state must have a backup plan when Plan A is unavailable.
ARIZONA DECLARING ITS INDEPENDENCE FROM OBAMA
House Bill 2368 prohibits the use of any government personnel or financial resources to enforce any of Obama’s executive orders
BarkGrowlBite | March 25, 2015
Arizona House Bill 2368:
Prohibits this state or any of its political subdivisions from using any personnel or financial resources to enforce, administer or cooperate with an executive order issued by the President of the U.S. that has not been affirmed by a vote of Congress and signed into law as prescribed by the U.S. Constitution.
Prohibits this state or any of its political subdivisions from using any personnel or financial resources to enforce, administer or cooperate with a policy directive issued by the U.S. DOJ to law enforcement agencies in this state that has not been affirmed by a vote of Congress and signed into law as prescribed by the U.S. Constitution.
The bill was introduced by Republican Representative Bob Thorpe of Flagstaff and passed the House along party lines by a vote of 36-24. The measure now goes to the Arizona Senate.
Arizona Republic columnist Laurie Roberts wrote:
…One of a series of kooky measures aimed at declaring [Arizona’s] independence from federal gun laws, from the Affordable Care Act, from the Environmental Protection Agency, from the Department of Justice, from Barack Obama and from just about anything else associated with the state’s most detested f-word. Federal, that is.
The bill should pass in the Senate if the majority of senators are Republicans. If the bill does pass the Senate, I am sure it will be signed into law by Gov. Doug Ducey. After that Arizona can look forward to a period of legal challenges.
Kooky or not, I like that bill!
BarkGrowlBite | March 25, 2015
Arizona House Bill 2368:
Prohibits this state or any of its political subdivisions from using any personnel or financial resources to enforce, administer or cooperate with an executive order issued by the President of the U.S. that has not been affirmed by a vote of Congress and signed into law as prescribed by the U.S. Constitution.
Prohibits this state or any of its political subdivisions from using any personnel or financial resources to enforce, administer or cooperate with a policy directive issued by the U.S. DOJ to law enforcement agencies in this state that has not been affirmed by a vote of Congress and signed into law as prescribed by the U.S. Constitution.
The bill was introduced by Republican Representative Bob Thorpe of Flagstaff and passed the House along party lines by a vote of 36-24. The measure now goes to the Arizona Senate.
Arizona Republic columnist Laurie Roberts wrote:
…One of a series of kooky measures aimed at declaring [Arizona’s] independence from federal gun laws, from the Affordable Care Act, from the Environmental Protection Agency, from the Department of Justice, from Barack Obama and from just about anything else associated with the state’s most detested f-word. Federal, that is.
The bill should pass in the Senate if the majority of senators are Republicans. If the bill does pass the Senate, I am sure it will be signed into law by Gov. Doug Ducey. After that Arizona can look forward to a period of legal challenges.
Kooky or not, I like that bill!
Tuesday, March 24, 2015
YET MORE WARPED MORALITY
By Bob Walsh
PACOVILLA Corrections blog | March 24, 2015
Jose Alberto Perez is 18-years old and is looking at spending the rest of his life as a guest of the state due to (among other things) a truly warped sense of morality.
It seems that at some point in the near past Perez’s mother was involved in some sort of a fight with another female. Perez believe he saw that woman as his stepfather’s place in South L.A. on Wednesday of last week. So, he did what any other law-abiding person would do, he took a shotgun over to his stepfather’s house and shot the woman in the face, killing her. As it turns out the woman, Yesenia DeLeon, 35, was his step-father’s current girlfriend and was not the woman who was involved in the fight with his mother. Whoops.
Perez is still in custody pending $2 million in bail. He is being charged with murder.
PACOVILLA Corrections blog | March 24, 2015
Jose Alberto Perez is 18-years old and is looking at spending the rest of his life as a guest of the state due to (among other things) a truly warped sense of morality.
It seems that at some point in the near past Perez’s mother was involved in some sort of a fight with another female. Perez believe he saw that woman as his stepfather’s place in South L.A. on Wednesday of last week. So, he did what any other law-abiding person would do, he took a shotgun over to his stepfather’s house and shot the woman in the face, killing her. As it turns out the woman, Yesenia DeLeon, 35, was his step-father’s current girlfriend and was not the woman who was involved in the fight with his mother. Whoops.
Perez is still in custody pending $2 million in bail. He is being charged with murder.
WALMARTIANS STRIKE AGAIN
Eight members of a family shopping at an Arizona Walmart assault a female store employee, then battle the cops in the parking lot
By Bob Walsh
PACOVILLA Corrections blog | March 23, 2015
I, among other people, routinely refer to customers of WalMart as WalMartians. They are often very, very strange. A case in point:
A bit of a hoorah developed at the WalMart in Cottonwood AZ overnight Sunday. Local cops responded to the parking lot at about midnight to break up a family fight. The fight somehow involved a female WalMart employee who had been assaulted by multiple members of a family. When the police showed up, the eight family members immediately attacked the cops. Seven officers were slightly injured in the melee. One family member was shot to death by the cops and a second was gutshot. A WalMart employee who dived in to help got a broken arm for his trouble.
Thank You for shopping at WalMart.
By Bob Walsh
PACOVILLA Corrections blog | March 23, 2015
I, among other people, routinely refer to customers of WalMart as WalMartians. They are often very, very strange. A case in point:
A bit of a hoorah developed at the WalMart in Cottonwood AZ overnight Sunday. Local cops responded to the parking lot at about midnight to break up a family fight. The fight somehow involved a female WalMart employee who had been assaulted by multiple members of a family. When the police showed up, the eight family members immediately attacked the cops. Seven officers were slightly injured in the melee. One family member was shot to death by the cops and a second was gutshot. A WalMart employee who dived in to help got a broken arm for his trouble.
Thank You for shopping at WalMart.
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